Dating Someone Who Is Not Emotionally Ready
Reader’s Relationship Question:
I’ve been dating this guy for a few months now, and I totally need your relationship expert advice. It seems things are going well, and I want him to be my boyfriend, but he’s commitment-phobic. He tells me he’s been burned in the past and just wants to keep things light and fun. Plus, he has a kid and says that things between him and his ex were left hanging. I don’t know if I should stay and wait until he irons his issues out, or if I should start dating other people. I feel bad because he’s everything I want, and yet it seems like he doesn’t feel the same way. What do you think is the best thing to do in this situation?
Relationship Advice:
Time and time again, women have come to me asking for dating advice on men who won’t commit. While the background details may differ, one thing is common: you are all involved with men who don’t love you. Yes, it’s painful to hear, but it’s the truth. If a man is truly in love with a woman, he will do everything he can to be in a relationship with her.
Now, you have to ask yourself: what do you really want? More often than not, women who get tangled up with men who have commitment issues may be afraid of commitment themselves. You have to sort out your own issues before you can be truly ready to step into a relationship.
Yes, he may seem worth it, and you can even see him as your soul mate, but if you the two of you don’t want the same things, then he’s not too perfect now, is he? It’s pretty clear you want a relationship and he doesn’t. What’s more, he has a lot of unresolved feelings towards his ex, and this can hurt you more in the long run. I suggest you get out of this setup now, or if you think you can’t, then accept things the way they are and stop expecting this will go anywhere. That’s the best relationship expert advice I can give you.
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