Reader’s Question:

I take my teddy bear to bed with me when I go to sleep, and my girlfriend hates it.

Relationship Advice:

You scare me. I’m actually hoping you’re a three-year-old kid with a very active imagination, but I don’t think so.

Kidding aside, I get the teddy bear thing. Some people are just not able to let go of old habits or are not yet prepared to put away their security blanket. That’s not really unheard of.

But we have to be able to put away our security blankets. We have to be able to face our insecurities and fears, or just be able to put away our favorite teddy bear. So, here’s free relationship advice just for you:  If you have issues, insecurities and whatnots, tell your girl. This could be an opportunity to further strengthen your bond. A heart-to-heart talk is always good in a relationship. This could be an opportunity for you to talk about things that are somehow unclear to you. This is also a chance to show her that being with her is the most important thing to you, and that a teddy bear (that’s probably worn out and scary-looking) will not stand between you and your girlfriend.

Find just out how much Teddy means to you. Know what Teddy represents. Take steps to let Teddy go. Let your girlfriend know that Teddy is leaving. Let the teddy bear go. I think it’s about time, too. If you were brave enough to step outside, meet the woman of your dreams and go after her, you should be brave enough to let go of Teddy in order to sustain the romance.

Basically, your girl is saying, “It’s either me or little Teddy. It stays, I go.”

My expert relationship advice is this: Ditch the bear. That’s sound expert relationship advice, if you ask me.

Come on. Did you really have to ask?

I know this is a free relationship advice, but please don’t waste this.

Technorati Tags: relationship expert advice

Reader’s Question:

My girlfriend makes funny sounds when she chews her food. It irritates me. What advice on relationship can you give me?

Relationship Advice:

That’s easy. Ask her to stop. Chewing does not have to be that exciting.  I don’t like it. The food is already dead. Chewing food does not have to be an act of violence.

If her chewing irritates you, then you should tell her so. Ask her to stop making those funny noises. Tell her why it irritates you.

I don’t believe that this issue with the chewing is going to be an issue at all. In a relationship, there are little things we do that might irritate or get on the nerves of our partner, but being in a relationship means growing or changing with your partner. You can’t be with someone, spend a lot of time with that someone and not change her and be changed. Changing these small things is part of that process. Some would opt to live with the small things unchanged while some would decide to change them. Asking her to change her chewing habits should not be a big thing. It doesn’t have to be. There will certainly come a time when she would ask you to change some small quirks of yours. This happens to be your turn.

If something about her affects you, be it positive or negative, you should let her know. If you want something changed, talk to her. It may or may not be changed, but the important thing is that it was brought to your partner’s attention.

There are days when cranking out expert relationship advice is easy. Thank you for giving me one of those days.

Technorati Tags: relationship expert advice

Reader’s Question:

Help! I need your relationship expert advice on this one. I’ve been going out with a guy for six months, and in the first few weeks of our relationship, we’ve been having sex twice or thrice a week. Now it’s down to once every other week, and I feel like he’s slowly losing interest. I’m not used to him rejecting my advances, and I’ve tried different ways of seducing him (cute lingerie, initiating contact such as stroking, etc.), and yet these ways are still not working. What am I doing wrong? And please tell me, how do I fix this?

Relationship Advice:

Many couples have come to me for dating advice, particularly on sexual incompatibility and the lack of sex drive. You are not alone in wondering why, after weeks of sexual bliss, your boyfriend doesn’t want to get intimate anymore. It could be different reasons, really, but the best way to find out is to communicate your feelings with him. Tell your boyfriend that you have needs as well and that it is frustrating you. Sex and money are two of the biggest issues when it comes to relationships, and if one department is not working, then the whole office (so to speak), will be affected. Go ahead and open this up with him and see how he reacts.

If you are afraid of speaking out, then consider these reasons (you may also ask him if any of these apply to him):

• Your partner could be depressed or undergoing an emotional crisis. It is best to talk this out with him. As you know, if one isn’t functioning well emotionally, then it would be hard to be physically intimate, as well. Find out what issues are bothering him.
• It could be a physical problem, as well. If your boyfriend used to be able to get it up frequently, and now whatever you do, it’s just not going that way, then maybe he should see a doctor.
• Is he taking drugs or drinking excessively? This could contribute to the lack of sex drive.
• One painful truth could be that he’s tired of you. If this is the case, the two of you should talk and find an amenable solution, one that can spice things up again. Maybe you’re always together? A little distance never hurt anyone.

These are just a number of things that can contribute to the lack of sex drive. Again, you are the best person to give yourself relationship expert advice. By talking to your boyfriend and communicating your frustrations, you have taken the first step in fixing your problems.

Technorati Tags: relationship expert advice